The actual context leads us to reconsider from home, what education is, both for students and parents. Education is a constant process. Assuming its challenges also implies it’s meaning, being the most important the generation of will, criteria and autonomy.
Regarding it as a process, Education must be considered as a resistance journey, rather than a race. Although there is an objective, constancy before immediacy is the key.
Education fundamentally requires putting virtues into practice and a particular attitude in relation to the person in the midst of development in front of us.
We hand you some guidelines that may result useful when generating learning processes at home.
Educate with calm
It may result paradoxical in a world where at times, speed seems to be the priority, but restful dialogue and serene reflection are some of the best expressions of calm and patience required to teach. In order to achieve that, a calm attitude is required before the beginning of dialogue.
You can tell how easy it is for children to adopt a more serene behaviour when they are in front of a quiet person, that interacts with them with a more sedated, conciliatory and friendly tone of voice. Before all, the little ones at home, need their parent’s patience in order to learn better and confront difficulties with calm and serenity. With patience you can better analyze the situation and what seemed a drawback, may suppose a great advance.
For you to develop a serene attitude, we suggest the following:
- Analyze with your children the causes and consequences of their behaviour. Start by mentioning “if you do this (inadequate conduct), then …” and let the child alone, find the consequence. Then, that consequence becomes a cause: “and if that happens, then…” And so on, until they themselves find the consequences of the things they have done. Try and do the same with positive causes.
- This will allow that they themselves raise the repairer actions and consequences after an inadequate conduct.
- Always remember how important it is that conflicts are solved with dialogue and communication. Focus on the needs and not on the inadequate conduct. Why did the conflict arise? What needs do we want to satisfy? Always look for win-win solutions, that is, that both parts involved in the conflict have their needs satisfied.
- Explain the reasons of the orders and requests that you eventually will give them.
Educate with time
Time has been more valued lately, especially because it seems to lack. Every action that has to be made and adds to the regular routine, in this case, virtual classes, demands a more creative and effective management of time. So, what is now a priority is the quality of time.
For the little one’s perception, time spent with them may reveal the importance of all that is happening to them, both internally and externally. Although short, what is important is that the time we dedicate to them comes at the right moment and with an almost total presence – at least for those minutes – from that meaningful adult to them.
To help you with the quality of the time you dedicate to your children these days when learning, we recommend you the following:
- Determine a specific period per day – even a short one- to share with them.
- Establish priorities on how and for what is the time you spend with them.
- Give them a definite space to acknowledge their everyday achievements.
Educate with affection and authority
To transmit an expected conduct (for example, the constancy to work from home), it requires both affection as well as rules to be determined at home. If you want rules and limits to be clear, you need to talk about the bond “by winning the little one’s hearts, advice will become stronger”. Furthermore, it contributes to a more effective modeling of the children’s expected behaviour. Parents that feed this bond are the most important persons in the child’s world. They identify with and imitate them. The bond will serve as a channel, but more important still, it will transmit the model of the attitude that is expected.
How can we feed this bond with our children? Here is some advice:
- Try to transmit a message of stability and harmony between what you do and what you expect from them.
- Build authority, not imposed, but earned by prestige through serenity and patience, maintaining a line of acting and showing interest for their studies or their problems.
- Reach specific agreements. Avoid continuous sermonizing and be firm when required.
- Pay attention to their good behaviour and praise their achievements.
- Take decisions as a team.
Educate with Understanding
Explaining things allows children to understand them clearly, because causes and consequences of their actions can be identified. For children this is of utter importance to have a better understanding of what is going on in their word – internally and externally. Nevertheless, the first step to be made is to embrace what the child has the intention of transmitting, that is, to understand him. And how this is accomplished?
- With trust and acceptance of what a child has to transmit.
- Taking into account their particular rhythm and perception of things.
- Listening actively each one of their interventions.
- Paying attentions to their requests.
Kevin Cosio – 2nd to 4th grade Psychologist
Paterson, C. (2011). Parenting Matters: Early Years and Social Mobility. London: CentreForum.
Iturbe, I. (2011). Diamantes por pulir. Madrid: Palabra.